Being threatened by anyone is not cool, but when a boyfriend or girlfriend threatens you, it can be very hurtful and even a little scary.
It’s important not to be paranoid, but to also look at this threat in light of reality. Is it real? Is it plausible? Is it done with malicious intent? If acted out will this threat cause you harm?
I hope you know me well enough to know I don’t like this kind of stuff. I think it’s pretty cowardly when threats are made especially when it’s blackmail in nature.
The best thing to do with threats are to tell people. When you shed light on this boyfriend or girlfriend who has the audacity to threaten you, you take their power away. I know it can be scary to talk about it, but think about it. It may be just what you need to do…not necessarily what you want to do.
Normal people don’t like threats. They know they’re crazy and it will cause people to come to your defense if need be. Think of it as kind of like having some insurance. If they follow through with this threat hopefully someone will come to your defense given the information you already gave them.
Breaking up with a person who does this should be priority number 1! They will only get worse and that means they will make your life miserable!
What ever you do, don’t play the game. I always tell my girls, “you can’t make a fair deal with the devil.” If you play their game you are playing with fire. Deal with it swiftly and effectively. You will be grateful!
I’ve been threatened several times before, so some of this comes from experience. Take it for what it’s worth 🙂
What if a guy likes me, but still has a girlfriend? Part 2
I went over this in Part 1, but I decided a Part 2 was necessary considering all the emails I was getting. Girls, in general, have pretty loving hearts and we want to believe the guy standing before us is really a Prince Charming.
But, guess what? If the guy standing before you who is all googly eyed and he still has a girlfriend, he is anything but Prince Charming! Don’t be fooled! You’re way too smart for this!
The “what if a guy likes me, but still has a girlfriend” is brought to me A LOT in a variety of different scenarios, but the answer is always the same.
Has it ever happened to you? Have you ever had this guy who was way flirty with you and you were like, ‘Hey, I really like this guy’…until you found out he had a girlfriend?
And then it happens. You begin to question reality and maybe end up part of this cheating triangle.
Let me ask you one question. Would you like it if your man was flirting with another girl and actually pursuing her while he was dating you?
No way! At least I hope that’s what you’d say! When a guy like you, but still has a girlfriend he has some decisions to make. If you don’t make him make one when it comes to you, then he will play both of you.
It will be one big game to him. You might say, ‘he would never do that to me!’ Well, talk to me in a few months. I always say, “treat yourself as the rule, not the exception.” That means if he’s doing that to her, he WILL do it to you!
If a guy likes you but still has a girlfriend then all you have to say is, ‘good for you!’ He won’t know what to say. Let him figure it out. Don’t allow yourself to be played and who really wants that kind of guy (a headache) anyway?!
Why do we let this question roll around in our heads for so long? We as women give the benefit of the doubt to often it seems.
In the 22 years of being a hairstylist I’ve heard an awful lot of juicy stories about jerk boyfriends and husbands. To be fair most of my clients were women so I’m not sure what their men thought of them! LOL
There is a real simple answer to why is my boyfriend such a jerk? It’s because we let them. We teach people how to treat us.
Will your boyfriend still be a jerk if you dump him? Yes. But, guess what? He’s not your problem to fix! So freeing to hear that, right?
Your only problem is you! When you have kids then they will be your problem to some degree as well, but for now focus on you. You are the only one you can control.
There are a lot of broken people out there all because they thought they could fix someone. It’s just not true. We can influence people, but we cannot change or fix them.
If YOU let someone mistreat you it’s extremely important to analyze why. There might be some codependency issues. Maybe you were treated horribly as a kid so you don’t expect more.
There are so many facets to this! Check out this video to see what I have to say about it. When boyfriends are jerks it can wreak so much havoc in our lives and our futures, so please listen up and make some great decisions here!
Oh how we really hate the guy (or girl) who won’t accept NO!
Have you ever had a guy not accept your “NO?” I have. It sucks. This can go either way, of course. It can be a lunatic girl, but to keep things easier for you to understand what I’m saying we will make the guy the nut job. 🙂
Depending on the guy it can actually be scary. Hopefully, it’s just annoying. Annoying or not, refusing to respect ‘no’ is a huge red flag. You may be dealing with a narcissist which is a whole lot of ‘not fun!’
You most certainly are dealing with someone who thinks they are better than others. If they didn’t, respecting another’s opinion would be no problem. ANYONE who can’t accept ‘NO’ is a train wreck.
Unfortunately, when women don’t know how to handle this guy they end up marrying them. Say what? You heard me right. When Mr. Won’t Accept No… aka: Mr. Predator… keeps pushing, the woman doesn’t know what else to do so she gives in. This very thing happened to me! AAHHH!! How I wish I could go back and have a do over!!
Women often reason that they just may be really special to him and that’s why he won’t give up. We’re special, no doubt, but that’s not what’s going on. He’s crazy. Read that again. He’s crazy. He’s a predator.
I don’t know about you, but the idea of being preyed upon does not sit well with me. It makes me really mad. I wish I would’ve been able to see it for what it was way back then, but my 20 year old self didn’t have a clue. Now I see the forest through the trees and I’d really love to help spare you from the Hell that comes with this guy.
So, listen up! There are only 2 teachers in life: wisdom and consequences. Wisdom is learning from the mistakes of others. And consequences come when you either don’t know or don’t listen. Consider most of these videos your warning…your loving warning. I truly hope you choose wisdom my friends.
Wow, do I get a lot of questions about this one! The story is really all the same though with just a few different details.
Where girls get stuck is they think they are the exception rather than the rule. So, if he will flirt and hit on you when he has a girlfriend, he will most certainly do that to you!
The type of guy how just can’t be fully faithful is not the kind of guy you want. He will prove to be a major headache for you. If a guy likes you, but still has a girlfriend and he tells you that just tell him you’re not interested.
Distancing yourself from him in anyway possible is going to be a good thing for you. You definitely do not want any part of this mess he’s trying to create.
Just ask yourself how you’d feel if you were the girlfriend. You’d be ticked and rightfully so.
I can’t remember what the movie is called, but it has the same guy who has a wife and two girlfriends. They find out about each other and team up as payback. It is SO funny!
He was absolutely the guy who was messing around on his girlfriend before she became his wife and all the girlfriends that came before her!
Spot him, avoid him, cut him off from yourself whether you want to or not. Trust me! You will thank me for it later and if you don’t you will wish you had!
Take if from someone who’s been there! My now ex-husband was the guy who had a second life that I found out about when I was 2 months pregnant with our second daughter. Our first daughter was only 15 months old. He was a nightmare then and he still is. Guys like that have terrible character all over the place. There’s really no good part of their character, so run!