How do I help my struggling teenager?
This question has been asked of me in many different facets. It’s a complicated topic, so I will try to focus on the big picture in hopes you can see some things you can do for your particular situation.
- Diagnose where the problem is coming from. Is it problems with friends? Have they been cut from a team? Are you going through a divorce?
- Fix what you can and try to make better what you can’t. If it is something you have some control over, then do something about it very quickly.
- Determine their love language and meet them there. 1. physical touch (hugs) 2. quality time (fully engage when you’re with them) 3. words of affirmation (find what they are doing right and comment on it) 4. gifts (don’t forget their birthday/Christmas etc and get them tiny things here and there to let them know you were thinking of them 4. acts of service (if they ask you to do something for them, make it a priority)
- Fun! Make having fun with them a consistent priority while making sure this is not the time to talk about anything you think they need to change or work on. It’s the fun zone so keep it light and well..fun!
- If they have a chemical imbalance check out Dr. Daniel Amen with Amen Clinics to see if this could be an option for you. https://binged.it/2IpDz2y
- Consider the fact that if you don’t have control over something with your child’s behavior, such as an eating disorder, then don’t try to exert that control…that you don’t have. It will blow up in your face. Get creative about how to deal with the problem without getting direct about i. Watch the video for ideas.
Hope this helps! Thank you on behalf of your kids!