Research shows good relationships keep us happier and healthier
Great relationships take intentionality, right? Check this out…Zameena Majia wrote an article on March 20, 2018 reporting on Harvard Study. I personally think this is fascinating mainly because it seems as technology is becoming so central to our everyday life, our relationships could be suffering. The following three paragraphs are an
“The ongoing Harvard study is considered one of the world’s longest studies of adult life, having started in 1938 during the Great Depression.”
“Our study has shown that the people who fared the best were the people who leaned into relationships, with family, with friends, with
Click on the link to learn more about the study. But for the sake of today’s video, let’s touch on some things that will REALLY help make those relationships happier and healthier.
When you’re upset with someone you care about, have a face to face conversation.
- Most of our communication is non-verbal, so….
- Texts, messages, emails, etc are not going to reflect our body language, & voice inflections, so…
- That can cause someone to misinterpret what we’re trying to say, so…
- We might end up with a friend or family member really mad at us when we didn’t mean it the way they took it (or even a person thinking we aren’t really turning them down when we are), so…
- We now have a mess to clean up and more stress that we definitely don’t need, so…
- Eat the toad and do the hard thing. Invite them to coffee and talk.
But how do you know who needs to be in the “important person in my life” category?
This is something I wish someone would have told me when I was in middle school…or maybe even elementary school, but would I have listened? I don’t really know. Maybe you’re like me and what you’re thinking is, “I just want to have fun,” or “I’m here for a good time, not a long time.” But here’s the thing…if you don’t make some good key decisions there will definitely NOT be any fun and there won’t be any good times to be had! So what is it I wish someone had told me?
- Does this person make me a better person? A lot of us are “fixers.” We look at people and think, “I could really help them with that,” but what we don’t realize is the ol’ chair analogy. If you’re the person on the chair trying to pull the person up who’s on the ground, does it work out that way? No. If both people are pulling, the one on the ground is going to win hands down. Life is the same way.
- Is this one of the best people you know? No, really. Think about all the people who are doing really well in life. They have been through some stuff in their businesses, their families, maybe their health, etc and came out the other side a wiser, better person. They got better instead of bitter.
- Do I feel like a genius for being with them? Think about explaining all the good, the bad, and the ugly about this person to a person you deeply respect. Do you feel like Einstein for being with them or do you feel like you’re making excuse after excuse to make them sound better than they are? Come on…we’ve all done it and it is okay! I’m right there with you! I have chosen some real “winners.”
Let me leave you with this that I may not have put in the video…You will end this relationship over the red flags you ignored in the beginning.