Sometimes you look at a person who give you the creeps and you have not one single clue as to why. You think, “What in the world is wrong with me? I must be getting cynical.” My gut instinct is screaming at me.
The absolute most important clue to identifying predatory people that was hard wired into you as you were being formed in your mother’s womb is this:
We all have a gut instinct about things. All of us. Some of us ignore it better than others. Some were taught to push through it. Let me tell you a story about how I was taught that exact thing.
When I was young my twin sister and I team roped with my dad. If you don’t know anything about rodeos and team roping, google some videos. We were my dad’s headers and it was a blast. It was awesome….but it came with a lot of risks.
Even though we didn’t grow up on the family ranch we did a lot of ranch work outside of the roping arena which also came with a lot of risks. We learned to read horses and cows long before we ever learned to read people because if we didn’t someone could get hurt bad or even die. Horses are great, but they are still 1200 pound flight animals with a brain which means when they are scared their survival instincts kick in to the level of, “IT’S GOING TO EEEEAAAAATTTTTT ME!!! AAAAHHHH!”
No kidding. When you have a horse throwing a fit underneath you it will get your adrenaline rolling real quick but it will also get your ability to read this horse to know what they are likely to do next rolling too. The faster you read them the safer you are. The faster you read them the more you can accomplish too.
But here’s the thing….When we pushed through scary stuff we got a nod of massive approval and the more dangerous is was the bigger the nod.
So let’s fast forward to men. I had not a clue how to read people. I couldn’t have picked out a nice guy if he had come up and flicked me in the forehead. I’m being totally real with you. I was that inept at reading people. I can still read everything about horses, but I have had to learn the very hard and cruel way about people, especially men.
For every man that turned out to be a bad idea there was a bad feeling I didn’t know what to do with. Had I known how to read them and to not push through them like I would a horse I would be in a much better place today. Thankfully, the silver lining is my daughters have highly tuned B.S. meters as a result of these rotten men in our lives.
But back to the instinct thing. We’ve all had gut feelings about things before whether it was a good one or a bad one.
The key is this:
YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO STICK AROUND TO FIGURE OUT WHY YOU HAVE THAT BAD GUT FEELING ABOUT SOMETHING OR SOMEONE!
That feeling is your sign to exit! Move on! Don’t be the one who is like Curious George. If you really have to know at least let someone else stand in and discover it for you. Let someone else flush out whatever is rotten inside this circumstance or person. Sit back and watch the explosion if you must but for the love of God…don’t be part of it! No one comes out unscathed from that!
Trust your instincts. If it feels bad it is. Period. You don’t have to justify a thing. If you have to end a relationship, just say, “I just don’t have a good feeling about this so I need to move on,” or “I don’t feel good about this so I need to do what’s best for me.”