Sometimes our kids ask us things and we feel like we need to defend ourselves when we say no, but what if we turned it around?
Make me feel like a genius for saying yes!
When our kids ask us if they can do something that is outside the realm of normal and we say no we often feel like we need to defend our no. Probably because they ask us to, but what if instead we tell them to defend their position?
What if we said, “Make me feel like a genius for saying yes.” I did that with my girls when they were young by asking them to approach me as a supreme court judge and they were the attorneys there to plead their case.
I asked them to think long, wide and deep about what they thought I would ask and then negotiate with me. Come up with compromises.
I can’t tell you how well this goes for them later because instead of being shut down and not even asking questions they build the confidence to attempt to negotiate with not only us but others as well in a very respectful way that is also taking into consideration what might be important to the other person.
So next time your child asks to do something, instead of saying no ask them to make you feel like a genius for saying yes. Tell me how it goes!
Much love! -Teresa